Bo knows cake. He made this cake all by himself, just for you. Will you take Bo's cake? Please say you will.

Bo Knows like a million things. Seriously. He knows everything. You name it, Bo knows it. Bo knows theraputic massage. Bo knows sharing. Bo knows the electric slide. Bo knows interior design (and illumination). Bo knows bloody knuckles. Bo knows warm, tender hugs (and slow, passionate kisses). Bo knows digging holes.

So if he knows all these things, why is he doing NOTHING?

Did Bo suddenly stop knowing things? Highly unlikely. He is simply holding out. Waiting for the moment to strike. Bo knows holding out. And he also knows being selfish. As very important people of the internet it is our "moral duty" to bring Bo back.

As you know, the world is a cold, dark place without Bo Jackson. It is a void in our existence. Bo Jackson was a home run hero. And a touchdown king. I'm not very good at homeruns. And to be honest, I've never scored a touchdown in my life. Odds are, neither have you. That is why Bo is so great and you're just an internet jerk. And that is also why we need somebody like Bo Jackson to sell us more stuff. So we can buy it.

Help Bo Jackson, internet fiends. I just want things to be the same again. To further support Bo, place this button on your website:

Be sure to link it to ""

A lot of nasty things were said about Bo Jackson. Not by me or you of course. But by Deion Sanders. He too played two sports, but neither quite as well our man Bo Jackson. Regardless, he was always starting trouble with Bo. He would spread vicious rumors on and off the field.
  • Deion said Bo stuffs his pants to try to make his member look bigger.
  • Bo said the only thing Deion Sanders ever had any talent for was kissing men.
  • Neon Deion said the only reason he took on a nick-name was because his actual name wasn't as cool as Bo. He was drunk while sharing that secret.
  • Deion said Bo doesn't flush the toilet, which is rude. This may or may not be true.
  • Bo said Deion has an offensive odor, reminicent of spoiled milk.
  • Deion said Bo doesn't know how to dance.
  • Bo said he did. And then they had a street rules dance contest 'till 3 in the morning, which Bo ultimately won with a tripple scissor kick. Deion Sanders is still alive today. He will probably try to make a comeback right after Bo. He's just that kind of dude.

Bo knows car care. He's a real handyman under the hood. He rarely forgets to check the oil.

Bo knows fishing. He's a fishing expert. He catches swordfish. Who else do you that catches swordfish. If I had a working shift key, I would have used a question mark on that question. But I should probably stick to jokes, or Bo at least. Not excuses. Not on Bo's tribute.

Check back soon for the "Bo Knows Photo Gallery". In the meantime SIGN THE PETITION! Be sure to tell everyone you know to do the same. Bo's fate is in our hands. I refuse to let him down.